ONE-TIME TWITTER THREAD POSTING GIG

Position: One-Time Twitter/X Thread Poster

Task: Post 72 pre-written satirical tweet threads to a Twitter/X account, automating the uploads with Buffer, with photos sourced and formatting optimised

Estimated Time: 10-12 hours total

Compensation: $100 USD (fixed, paid on completion via PayPal or Wise)


THE JOB

I have ---------- fully written Twitter/X threads that need posting manually to my account as reply chains. Each thread is between 5-27 tweets targeting UK and international public figures — politicians, central bankers, military leaders, tech CEOs, royals, and heads of supranational organisations. All text is written — you are not writing anything.

For each of the 72 threads you will:

1. Find a suitable, clear, recognisable photo of the target (Google Images, Wikipedia, or similar — these are all well-known public figures, so any widely available photo is fine). The photo should be a headshot or upper body shot, ideally looking slightly ridiculous or unflattering. Use your judgement.

2. Post Tweet 1 with the photo attached.

3. Reply to Tweet 1 with Tweet 2. Reply to Tweet 2 with Tweet 3. Continue until the thread is complete.

4. Before posting each tweet, review the spacing — if a tweet has multiple sentences or points, break them across lines so each point lands cleanly. No walls of text. Use line breaks to make each tweet visually punchy and easy to scan on mobile. Think: one idea per line where possible.

That's the whole job. Find a photo, post the thread, make it look sharp.




WHAT I PROVIDE

Login credentials for the Twitter/X account. Access to my Buffer account ( ---------- ) for scheduling.

A spreadsheet containing all 72 threads with tweet text in exact posting order (thread name, tweet number, total tweets in thread, exact text, scheduled date and time). Clear written instructions.

SCHEDULE

Threads are posted three times per week: Mondays at 08:00 UK time, Wednesdays at 18:00 UK time, and Fridays at 12:00 UK time. The spreadsheet includes the exact date and time for each thread. The schedule runs from March 9, 2026 to August 21, 2026 (24 weeks).

You will use my Buffer account to schedule each thread at its assigned date and time. Post Tweet 1 (the hook tweet with the ???? emoji and photo) at the scheduled time, then post the remaining tweets as replies in a chain immediately after. If Buffer does not support threading, post Tweet 1 via Buffer at the scheduled time and then manually post the reply chain on the day.


POSTING INSTRUCTIONS

1. Log in to the Twitter/X account and Buffer (credentials provided).
2. Open the thread spreadsheet.
3. For each thread: find a photo of the target. Schedule or post Tweet 1 with the photo attached at the date/time shown in the spreadsheet. Then reply with Tweet 2, reply to that with Tweet 3, and continue until the thread is complete.
4. Before posting each tweet, review the spacing — if a tweet has multiple sentences or points, break them across lines so each point lands cleanly. No walls of text. Use line breaks to make each tweet visually punchy and easy to scan on mobile. Think: one idea per line where possible.
5. Do NOT change any wording. You may ONLY adjust line breaks and spacing within each tweet for readability.
6. Send me a confirmation message with a link to the thread after every 15 threads.



REQUIREMENTS

A Twitter/X account of your own (so you understand how threads and reply chains work). Good eye for visual formatting — you're optimising how the tweets look on screen. Ability to find appropriate public-domain photos of well-known public figures. Accurate copy-pasting — no typos, no missed tweets, no broken reply chains. Availability to complete all 72 threads within 3 weeks of starting. Reliable internet connection.


TARGET LIST (72 threads)

UK Politicians: RACHEL REEVES, EMILY THORNBERRY, DAVID LAMMY, ANGELA RAYNER, SADIQ KHAN, MATT HANCOCK, KEIR STARMER, JOHN HEALEY (UK DEFENCE SECRETARY), ED DAVEY, ROBERT JENRICK, ED MILIBAND, WES STREETING, ANDY BURNHAM.

UK Legacy / Former PMs & Chancellors: JEREMY HUNT, PETER MANDELSON, TONY BLAIR, GEORGE OSBORNE, ALASTAIR CAMPBELL, GORDON BROWN, RISHI SUNAK, BOB GELDOF.

UK Media & Public Figures: JAMES O'BRIEN, GARY LINEKER, PIERS MORGAN, MARTIN LEWIS, OWEN JONES, FIONA BRUCE, HUW EDWARDS.

UK Business: ALAN SUGAR.

Royal Family: KING CHARLES III.

US Administration: MARCO RUBIO, LINDSEY GRAHAM, NIKKI HALEY, VICTORIA NULAND, DONALD TRUMP, JOHN BOLTON, SCOTT BESSENT (US TREASURY), PETE HEGSETH, JD VANCE, MIKE JOHNSON, MIKE POMPEO, JANET YELLEN, DAVID SACKS.

Middle East / Wartime: RECEP TAYYIP ERDOGAN, BENJAMIN NETANYAHU.

Central Bankers / CBDC: AGUSTIN CARSTENS (BANK FOR INTERNATIONAL SETTLEMENTS), MARK CARNEY (CANADA / FORMER BOE), KRISTALINA GEORGIEVA (IMF), ANDREW BAILEY (BANK OF ENGLAND), PAN GONGSHENG (PEOPLE'S BANK OF CHINA).

Supranational / Global Governance: ANTONIO GUTERRES (UNITED NATIONS), CHRISTINE LAGARDE (ECB), TEDROS ADHANOM (WHO), JUSTIN TRUDEAU, URSULA VON DER LEYEN (EU COMMISSION), KLAUS SCHWAB (WEF), ALEX SOROS (OPEN SOCIETY), YUVAL NOAH HARARI.

European Leaders: FRIEDRICH MERZ (GERMANY), EMMANUEL MACRON, GIORGIA MELONI.

Tech / Surveillance / Finance: SATYA NADELLA (MICROSOFT), SUNDAR PICHAI (GOOGLE / ALPHABET), JAMIE DIMON (JPMORGAN CHASE), MARK ZUCKERBERG, LARRY FINK (BLACKROCK), PETER THIEL, SAM ALTMAN, TIM COOK (APPLE), PETER SCHIFF.

COVID Advisory: JONATHAN VAN-TAM, CHRIS WHITTY.




COMPENSATION: $100 USD

Paid in full on completion via PayPal or Wise. This is a one-time fixed-price task, not a recurring role.


HOW TO APPLY

1. Confirm you understand how Twitter reply-chain threads work.
2. Confirm you can find and attach photos of public figures.
3. Confirm you can complete 72 threads within 3 weeks.
4. Confirm your PayPal or Wise email for payment.

Keep it short. I need someone reliable with a decent eye for formatting.